Nerdgasms 2.0

So this was EA’s attempt at bringing the ‘Medal of Honor’ franchise up to par with the likes of Call of Duty, coming from someone who desperately wanted this game to be good, it was disappointing. It wasn’t bad, I enjoyed playing some of it; there were enough gimmicks between the standard point A to point B missions to keep it bareable and some pretty nice visuals between the cut scenes, which are ultimately pointless eye candy because the story is unmemorable and bland.

Yeah, there were a handful of admittedly cool moments that kept piquing my interest, like a mission where you get to blow the fuck out of some Taliban skulls sniper style, a quad bike mission, a few airborne helicopter/jet missions that involve you blowing up everything in the middle east but that’s as far as it goes really, the rest of the missions are, like I mentioned before, advancing to point A to point B whilst occasionally coming under fire. As for the online, it’s a fairly decent standard selection of team games with a handful of varying maps…It’s again, OK…but nothing special.

Also as far as I know it’s the only game I know where you actually get to play as the Taliban…which is…controversial to say the least.

But the bottom line is it is literally the same as an easy, mediocre PS2/Xbox shooter. How the game ended up this mediocre is beyond me, obviously the developers had the goliath of COD to contend with, but what I don’t get is they must have played at least one of the last few cod games, they would have known what the standard to beat, or at least match, was. It barely comes close as a contender.

For those who haven’t played it, it’s a completely standard shooter, with a standard plot, standard graphics and standard gameplay. Don’t waste your money on it until you (inevitably) see it for a fiver in the pre-owned section in any store in a couple of month’s time.

~Dan

ALSO, It seems a sequel is in the works! Lets hope its better, for more info, clickity click: http://gamer.blorge.com/2011/01/08/medal-of-honor-2-already-in-development/

So with a recent revisit back to ‘dead rising 2’ land, I noticed as I was mowing down various zombies with a lawnmower whilst drenched in blood and wearing weird outfits (cowboy chaps and a dress, anyone?) I noticed that a lot of the survivors in need of rescue play into my perception of stereotypes.

I mean, it’s not a bad thing, whether they meant to do it with purposely hack dialogue or not, it actually makes the game that much more hilarious to hear their little tid-bits of speech among the mulching and slicing of my paddle-saw, a personal favourite being the ‘oh no you did’n head bob’ from LaShawndra, a middle age black woman with a spear in one hand and some chicken in the other (just kidding on the last bit, she actually has a wrench if a I remember for some reason.)

Other favourites include the shotgun toting redneck cowboy, Chad, the goth/punk band ‘Angel lust’ as a whole, the poker playing, overweight nerd dressed as a night, and  quite a few more as well.

And of course then there’s all the main characters who again are walking stereotypes, Sullivan (old grey security guard), Chuck (last action hero) and Stacey (Red headed environmentalist wearing denims)

In a more serious game this would have annoyed me, but (and let’s face it) the hack dialogue and uninspired caricatures of walking stereotypes that are spread across the whole thing work extremely well in a game where you, essentially, run around as a cross dresser, motocross champion zombie slayer, whilst at the same time, delivering cheesy one liners and wielding any combination of items stuck together with duct tape.

I ‘saw’ what you did there. ~Dan